Today we talk about asparagus.
Every year, on the last weekend of April (unless it's Easter weekend), my hometown holds the Stockton Asparagus Festival, also known as The Best of the West Food Fest. But that's not really true. I have had MUCH better food that was no where near the Asparagus Festival. I digress.
This year, the festival was bumped up a week from its normal late-April slot, because apparently people like Jesus more than they like asparagus.* Turns out that this particular weekend, I scheduled to do 4 different things on Saturday, because I guess that's just how organized I am.
First off, my friend asked me to my alma mater's prom, which I really wanted to go to because I was lame and missed my prom. Yeah, I know. I was so excited for it because HELLO, PROM WITH MY FRIENDS, and had my dreams crushed when my mom told me I couldn't go. Apparently, my mom told me I couldn't go because I HAVE TO GET MY FREAKING NOT WISE TEETH YANKED OUT OF MY FREAKING MOUTH ON FREAKING SATURDAY. I don't even know how to deal with this, so I'm not going to talk about it.
Figuring I'd be able to go on Friday to volunteer for my old band director/friend, I planned on spending most of Friday there. OH, BUT HEY, CAN'T DO THAT BECAUSE I HAVE A FREAKING DENTIST APPOINTMENT SO THE FREAKING DENTIST CAN FREAKING LOOK AT MY FREAKING TEETH SO THAT HE CAN FREAKING YANK THEM THE FREAK OUT ON FREAKING SATURDAY.
Also, Martin Lawrence is in town on Saturday and I was going to go see him with my dad. BUT NO, CAN'T DO THAT. GOTTA GO GET MY FREAKING TEETH YANKED OUT BY THAT FREAKING DENTIST INSTEAD.
OH, AND GET THIS. You know who's playing the festival on Saturday. SMASH MOUTH. FREAKING. SMASH MOUTH. BUT I CAN'T SEE THEM, BECAUSE I'LL BE FREAKING LOOPY ON FREAKING DRUGS FROM GETTING MY FREAKING WISDOM TEETH YANKED OUT INSTEAD. YOU KNOW. JUST FREAKING PAIN.
Now, have a list of all the DELICIOUS things that I wont get to have this weekend:
-Asparagus.
-Deep fried asparagus.
-Asparagus burritos.
-Asparagus pasta.
-Asparagus asparagus.
-ASPARAGUS.
I will, however, get to have asparagus ice cream, because the guy who makes the required 100 POUNDS of it for the event is a family friend and gave us a bunch. So, yum! And before you say "ew," know that it tastes asparagus-y, but is also sweet and actually pretty good. Better than asparagus beer... not that I know what that tastes like. *whistles*
Well, I'm going to go and resume talking to my bffl Nikki, who you should all follow on Twitter and junk. She's @latuacantante17. And awesome. And amazing. And one of my roommates for Leaky Con. And saying stuff in Skype now, so I think she needs my attention.
Ta-ta for now!
More info on the Asparagus Festival:
http://dft.ba/-latuacantante17
*I kid, I kid. Please don't be offended.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
This is technically a blog post.*
*I am really tired from doing schoolwork and I figured that if Hayley can do it, I can do it.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
I MET THAT ANDREW SLACK. I MET THAT DARREN CRISS. I MET THAT COMBINATION ANDREW SLACK AND DARREN CRISS.
Last night, I had a dream.* It was Thanksgiving at my grandparent's house, and into the warm, omnomtacular smelling air walked Darren Criss. You know, just normal things. The weirdest part about it was that none of us acted weirdly about it. He was just kind of there. Not out of place. Nobody special. He was just Darren.
I thought about it a little longer this morning, and then, in class, I realized this wasn't the first time I've had a dream that Darren's been in. I couldn't help but laugh about it, and got an angry glare from my logic professor, who was talking about truth tables or some other mundane as hell topic. In my next class, I got distracted and missed critiquing an entire 40 line soliloquy. What distracted me? The title of this blog came to me and it was magic and I died and I am dead and also a ghost writer.**
So anyway, the first dream:
I was at my old school, at an after school, super secret, illegal band practice in the gym. No idea why it was illegal, but it just was. Our director, Mr. Art Coleman, a scary loud man who you don't want to ignore, told us to cross the campus back to the bandroom. We crossed, worrying that we'd be caught by the small but terrifying campus security monitor, "Miss Ernestine", whose goal in life was to stop the band. She was kind of a dream-real-life Sue Sylvester.
Well, turns out she caught us. We all managed to get across the poorly laid out campus in seconds, and made it into the newly put in hallway maze that was full of hiding spaces. What can I say? I guess I'm an architect.*** Turns out she knows all of the hiding spaces, so we were sent home.
It was dark and my family was nowhere to be found, and I was too young (17?) to drive, so my teacher, who had somehow turned into Andrew Slack, gave me a ride home. On the way home, he decided he was hungry and insisted on buying use cheeseburgers. Thanks again, Andrew!
We got out of the car, food in hand, at a house that wasn't mine. I walk around the car to assist Slackman with the food, but he had turned into someone claiming to be my friend Nikki's grandfather. I was resistant at first, but I ended up entering the house with him to eat that burger.
Did I mention he was creepy looking?
We climbed the stairs up the side of the house, completely ignoring the front door. I'm really surprised my Spidey Senses weren't tingling to let me know how bad of an idea that was. I walked in, as he held the bulky door open for me, and was immediately flabbergasted to see the very same treble clef statue that Darren Criss posed with on the cover of his imaginary album. Turns out the creepy stairs leading up the side of the house went immediately back down inside to form a balcony over the coolest living room I'd ever seen.
I went to the bathroom to was my hands, because that is the biggest worry you should have when accepting food from creepy old men that you don't know. (Sorry, Nikki! He wasn't REALLY your grandpa. At least, I hope not.) When I returned, the old man was sitting at the bottom of the balcony. It was more like a stairs-cony. I don't remember anything besides the steps just stopping. It was kind of cool, actually.
I went down to sit next to the old man, looked at him, and he was Darren Criss. You know, I've just been bought food by the combination Art Coleman/Andrew Slack/Not Nikki's Grandpa/Darren Criss.**** AND I AM IN HIS HOUSE. So then, we talked about music for a minute or so and my alarm went off. It's a pity, I was having fun.
That's all for today, folks! See you tomorrow!
*I feel like I've already made this joke this month, so I'm not going to do it again.
**GEDDIT?!
***Have you guys all seen Inception? I really hope you have. Great, great, great film. Definitely worth checking out.
**** http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQ8ViYIeH04
I thought about it a little longer this morning, and then, in class, I realized this wasn't the first time I've had a dream that Darren's been in. I couldn't help but laugh about it, and got an angry glare from my logic professor, who was talking about truth tables or some other mundane as hell topic. In my next class, I got distracted and missed critiquing an entire 40 line soliloquy. What distracted me? The title of this blog came to me and it was magic and I died and I am dead and also a ghost writer.**
So anyway, the first dream:
I was at my old school, at an after school, super secret, illegal band practice in the gym. No idea why it was illegal, but it just was. Our director, Mr. Art Coleman, a scary loud man who you don't want to ignore, told us to cross the campus back to the bandroom. We crossed, worrying that we'd be caught by the small but terrifying campus security monitor, "Miss Ernestine", whose goal in life was to stop the band. She was kind of a dream-real-life Sue Sylvester.
Well, turns out she caught us. We all managed to get across the poorly laid out campus in seconds, and made it into the newly put in hallway maze that was full of hiding spaces. What can I say? I guess I'm an architect.*** Turns out she knows all of the hiding spaces, so we were sent home.
It was dark and my family was nowhere to be found, and I was too young (17?) to drive, so my teacher, who had somehow turned into Andrew Slack, gave me a ride home. On the way home, he decided he was hungry and insisted on buying use cheeseburgers. Thanks again, Andrew!
We got out of the car, food in hand, at a house that wasn't mine. I walk around the car to assist Slackman with the food, but he had turned into someone claiming to be my friend Nikki's grandfather. I was resistant at first, but I ended up entering the house with him to eat that burger.
Did I mention he was creepy looking?
We climbed the stairs up the side of the house, completely ignoring the front door. I'm really surprised my Spidey Senses weren't tingling to let me know how bad of an idea that was. I walked in, as he held the bulky door open for me, and was immediately flabbergasted to see the very same treble clef statue that Darren Criss posed with on the cover of his imaginary album. Turns out the creepy stairs leading up the side of the house went immediately back down inside to form a balcony over the coolest living room I'd ever seen.
I went to the bathroom to was my hands, because that is the biggest worry you should have when accepting food from creepy old men that you don't know. (Sorry, Nikki! He wasn't REALLY your grandpa. At least, I hope not.) When I returned, the old man was sitting at the bottom of the balcony. It was more like a stairs-cony. I don't remember anything besides the steps just stopping. It was kind of cool, actually.
I went down to sit next to the old man, looked at him, and he was Darren Criss. You know, I've just been bought food by the combination Art Coleman/Andrew Slack/Not Nikki's Grandpa/Darren Criss.**** AND I AM IN HIS HOUSE. So then, we talked about music for a minute or so and my alarm went off. It's a pity, I was having fun.
That's all for today, folks! See you tomorrow!
*I feel like I've already made this joke this month, so I'm not going to do it again.
**GEDDIT?!
***Have you guys all seen Inception? I really hope you have. Great, great, great film. Definitely worth checking out.
**** http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQ8ViYIeH04
Monday, April 11, 2011
Jordan rambles.
I have really done nothing today, guys. I woke up too early, went to class, came home, did my homework, and have just spent the day here with my dog. I really should get one of those things. I think they're called lives? Maybe I'll ask for one for Christmas.
As I'm sure you noticed, I'm already running out of things to talk about in these posts, so I'm just going to ramble for a bit and we'll see how that goes.
I really enjoy music. I'm sure that you'll think me stupid and obvious for saying that, but it's true. I love discovering new music, playing music, reading music, writing music. Everything. I love it all. The thing is, though, everybody is trying to pressure me into becoming a music major and that is just something I do not want to do. I've seen my former teachers, now friends, break down. I've seen them freak out because they have no idea what to do. I've seen one of them take a two month break because they said that if they didn't, the only other option for sanity would be to quit their job. I don't want that.
Sure, there are other jobs relating to music, but who says I could have one? I don't have the patience to practice like hell and become a performance major, and I definitely don't want to do something that I think is silly, like becoming a music historian or therapist. I just don't know what to do to get everybody off of my back.
Almost half of a year ago now, I decided that I would like to be a teacher. For those of you who don't know me, I've said for my whole life that I wouldn't be a teacher. I regret it now, because teaching is something I actually care about. Sure, I haven't been the best student, but I want other people to be able to learn from my mistakes, and I want to be able to help them.
The problem is that I haven't exactly been able to determine what it is that I could help them in. I'm really passionate about English, reading, and writing, but I don't know that I'll ever feel qualified enough to teach it. I can't stand math, but it is probably my strongest suit. Yeah, actually, no, screw that. Math is just not going to happen, guys. History is bland for me, and science is only fun whenever you get to do experiments. So yeah, maybe it will be English that I teach.
Still, I can't help but think that I won't be able to teach it. I don't have the best grammar. I haven't read most "classic" books that everyone else seems to know. But I often find myself getting lost in the language. I find reality blurring, and get into reading or writing as if it's the only thing that exists.
Speaking of writing, I didn't ever end up starting Script Frenzy. Whoops! Maybe these "write this much in this amount of time" things just aren't for me. The farthest I've ever gotten into NaNoWriMo is somewhere short of 40,000 words. I just reread that sentence. Okay, so that's not BAD. Still. I think I'm better when I have time to plan things out, instead of just rambling on for a few paragraphs and then stopping until the next day.
As I'm sure you noticed, I'm already running out of things to talk about in these posts, so I'm just going to ramble for a bit and we'll see how that goes.
I really enjoy music. I'm sure that you'll think me stupid and obvious for saying that, but it's true. I love discovering new music, playing music, reading music, writing music. Everything. I love it all. The thing is, though, everybody is trying to pressure me into becoming a music major and that is just something I do not want to do. I've seen my former teachers, now friends, break down. I've seen them freak out because they have no idea what to do. I've seen one of them take a two month break because they said that if they didn't, the only other option for sanity would be to quit their job. I don't want that.
Sure, there are other jobs relating to music, but who says I could have one? I don't have the patience to practice like hell and become a performance major, and I definitely don't want to do something that I think is silly, like becoming a music historian or therapist. I just don't know what to do to get everybody off of my back.
Almost half of a year ago now, I decided that I would like to be a teacher. For those of you who don't know me, I've said for my whole life that I wouldn't be a teacher. I regret it now, because teaching is something I actually care about. Sure, I haven't been the best student, but I want other people to be able to learn from my mistakes, and I want to be able to help them.
The problem is that I haven't exactly been able to determine what it is that I could help them in. I'm really passionate about English, reading, and writing, but I don't know that I'll ever feel qualified enough to teach it. I can't stand math, but it is probably my strongest suit. Yeah, actually, no, screw that. Math is just not going to happen, guys. History is bland for me, and science is only fun whenever you get to do experiments. So yeah, maybe it will be English that I teach.
Still, I can't help but think that I won't be able to teach it. I don't have the best grammar. I haven't read most "classic" books that everyone else seems to know. But I often find myself getting lost in the language. I find reality blurring, and get into reading or writing as if it's the only thing that exists.
Speaking of writing, I didn't ever end up starting Script Frenzy. Whoops! Maybe these "write this much in this amount of time" things just aren't for me. The farthest I've ever gotten into NaNoWriMo is somewhere short of 40,000 words. I just reread that sentence. Okay, so that's not BAD. Still. I think I'm better when I have time to plan things out, instead of just rambling on for a few paragraphs and then stopping until the next day.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Shortest BEDA in the history of BEDAs
Spent the day at a park, helping the chilluns practice playing base/softball.
At my uncle's house now, but I won't have time to write anything when I get home, because I have a bunch of homework to do. I hop you have all been well, and I promise to write more tomorrow. See ya then!
At my uncle's house now, but I won't have time to write anything when I get home, because I have a bunch of homework to do. I hop you have all been well, and I promise to write more tomorrow. See ya then!
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Past Jordan, here to save the day!
Today, I will be doing many things. Here is a list of them:
-I will probably read all of Shakespeare's As You Like It, the Commentaries in the back of the book, and finish Sorcerer's Stone for the first time in my new found adulthood.
-I will clean my dad's entire house, probably, since he was planning on inviting my family over for dinner to celebrate my birth or something. Whoopdeefreakingdoo. Don't get me wrong: I love my family, but they're just a lot to handle sometimes.
-I will juggle for at least 4 hours. I'm determined to get back into juggling shape, seeing as I had a two month-ish break back in December/January, and haven't really juggled since.
-I will take my little brother to his baseball game, which is exciting because it will be the first one I actually get to go to. Go Reds!
-I will hopefully go for a bike ride, because I really am going to need a break from my dad's house after cleaning it all.
-I will sleep a lot, probably, since my sleeping schedule is way off now.
Well, that's it, folks. Past Jordan has got to go back to Friday to get down and pack a bag for the weekend. Talk to you guys tomorrow!
-I will probably read all of Shakespeare's As You Like It, the Commentaries in the back of the book, and finish Sorcerer's Stone for the first time in my new found adulthood.
-I will clean my dad's entire house, probably, since he was planning on inviting my family over for dinner to celebrate my birth or something. Whoopdeefreakingdoo. Don't get me wrong: I love my family, but they're just a lot to handle sometimes.
-I will juggle for at least 4 hours. I'm determined to get back into juggling shape, seeing as I had a two month-ish break back in December/January, and haven't really juggled since.
-I will take my little brother to his baseball game, which is exciting because it will be the first one I actually get to go to. Go Reds!
-I will hopefully go for a bike ride, because I really am going to need a break from my dad's house after cleaning it all.
-I will sleep a lot, probably, since my sleeping schedule is way off now.
Well, that's it, folks. Past Jordan has got to go back to Friday to get down and pack a bag for the weekend. Talk to you guys tomorrow!
Friday, April 8, 2011
BEDTYRTBYHTLFTWAWBBITTBFTNDA.
Blog Every Day That You Remember To Before You Have To Leave For The Weekend And Won't Be Back In Time To Blog For The Next Day in April. I don't even care about that atrocious capitalizing.
Last night, I had a dream.* Wait. No, that's not right. Last night, I didn't have a dream at all because I didn't sleep. That's right! From somewhere past midnight until 5:30, when my dog woke up crying, I just sat there on my bed, doing nothing at all. At 5:30, I went out into the living room to comfort him and decided to stay there because he was a bit shaky. Must have had a bad dream.
I finally fell asleep at about 6:30, and instead of waking me up at 6:30 like I'd asked her to, my mom decided that it would be all right for me to miss my only class of the day. So, now I'll have to figure out a way to turn in the assignment that was do, and figure out if we did anything important that I need to know. Fun.**
In a few minutes, I need to clean my room and pack a bag, for I will be off to my dad's for the weekend. Thanks again for the birthday wished!
See you guys tomorrow, if I manage to write another post in the next five minutes. If not, oh well, another failed year of BEDA.
*I found myself in a desert called... Cyberland. It was hot, my canteen had sprung a leak and I was... thirsty.
**FUN, FUN, FUN, YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS. Happy Friday, everyone.
Last night, I had a dream.* Wait. No, that's not right. Last night, I didn't have a dream at all because I didn't sleep. That's right! From somewhere past midnight until 5:30, when my dog woke up crying, I just sat there on my bed, doing nothing at all. At 5:30, I went out into the living room to comfort him and decided to stay there because he was a bit shaky. Must have had a bad dream.
I finally fell asleep at about 6:30, and instead of waking me up at 6:30 like I'd asked her to, my mom decided that it would be all right for me to miss my only class of the day. So, now I'll have to figure out a way to turn in the assignment that was do, and figure out if we did anything important that I need to know. Fun.**
In a few minutes, I need to clean my room and pack a bag, for I will be off to my dad's for the weekend. Thanks again for the birthday wished!
See you guys tomorrow, if I manage to write another post in the next five minutes. If not, oh well, another failed year of BEDA.
*I found myself in a desert called... Cyberland. It was hot, my canteen had sprung a leak and I was... thirsty.
**FUN, FUN, FUN, YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS. Happy Friday, everyone.
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